Downs and Ups

This week started off terribly. I felt guilty for not swimming, pained by my TFL injury, and annoyed by the New Year resolution crowd taking up too much space at the gym. After sweating through another spinning class on a bike with a broken computer for the third time in a row, I showed up at the treadmill running class for which I had registered, only to not get one because I was passive aggressive and didn't "fight" for one. Without saying good bye to my coach I fled to the locker rooms, patiently waited for a shower to free up and weeped like a 6 year old feeling like a miserable failure of an athlete. At that point in the week, I seriously questioned my mental ability to train another 3 months.

The next morning, as my physical therapist massaged my TFL muscle and forbid me from running for 2 months, I knew I had hit "a" rock bottom and the only way back was up. So I mentally engaged myself to more swimming. The running part, I can wing. The swimming part, definitively not since I will be in open water. No more excuses for sticking out the pool, I am back and to show my comittment I bought a wet suit.

All this to say, the triathlon will probably be a lot of fun on race day, but training is definitively not easy and some days/ weeks, I can't help but feeling discouraged by a bad workout or negative comment. It's like studying for the SATs or the GMAT. Months long preparations for an uncertain outcome, and lots of little dramas when failing/ not doing well on the tests along the way.

11 more weeks to race day. Hold tight...

My new wetsuit, there will be PAM action going on in there.


Did the coach try to make me feel better by posting this photo in the weekly newsletter to promote the next social event? There is so much wrong with this.... like how much of a midget I am compared to the athletes I hope to compete with, eventually. The fact that my first appearance on the triathlon club's scene is with a drink in hand, at a karaoke bar. Sigh.